A (Late) MySpace Rant

At this very moment, there are probably hundreds of new start-ups based completely around offering shitty MySpace layouts and animated falling hearts for your page, coded with the worst barely-legitimate, copy-and-pasted examples of CSS I've ever seen. The sad part is that this "demon-spawn offspring" website dedicated to our MySpace-obsessed society isn't even direct from the belly of the beast itself.

I hate MySpace. It's a useful tool for when it's absolutely necessary to contact some high school idiot, but I try to avoid it as much as possible. In fact I just used some run-of-the-mill CSS from those very "MySpace Layouts... OMG!!!1" websites I've grown to despise in order to redirect people to my blog, play some music I've been listening to in the hopes of converting the "commercially obsessed"-crowd, and absolutely nothing else. No more pointless messages. No more friend requests from amateur porn stars. No more fighting over who is on whose Top 8 or 420 or whatever. No more time wasted (the little that still existed, mind you) on MySpace, which shall henceforth be referred to as "The Horrible Space Thing."

For one, these "Horrible Space Thing"-layout sites provide the most horribly-assembled and illogical CSS/HTML I've ever seen. They are essentially butchering the language as if forcibly inserting it into something it will never fit into, neglecting the poor children who will spend hours randomly rearranging the code they've taken in the hopes of fixing their precious broken "Horrible Space Thing" page.

It doesn't help that Horrible Space Thing is designed horribly to begin with, with the adminitrators sure to mess around with the layout in a few weeks and adding new "features" which are sure to keep the target audience's attention span for a few more minutes. It also doesn't help that many of these layout sites steal images from an unexpecting administrator's server, causing them to resort to horrible tactics for those unfortunate enough to continue hotlinking the image in their layouts.

At my high school, half the population focused half their day to finding a new proxy server to browse the Horrible Space Thing, which the school system kept blocking by any means possible, only to play catch up to the handful of new proxies showing up every week. It was a stupidly impossible game of catch up with no intentions of announcing a victor. Ever.

I believe I've taken enough time to drive the point into your head by now. MySpace is teh suxx0rs, or however your particular niche says it. I don't like it. Make it go away.

That is all.